Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Snips and Snails and Puppy-dog Tails on Ice
Have you ever been getting over a head cold? You know the kind that lingers for weeks - nose running, clearing your throat constantly, oozing, watery eyes and every once in a while a cough that brings up your socks? Now I'm sure we're all far too Lady & Gentleman like to dispose of the "progeny" of our bronchials and lungs anywhere but in a sterile, designated area, but sometimes events do not allow us a polite hack into garbage-bound tissues. I'll venture that either outdoors or possibly in the privacy of the shower, one or two of us may have let the "farmer's blow" go! One finger to the nostril of your choice and clear the other with compressed exhalation.
You may not have ever given what comes out a second thought, but did you kow it contains enough DNA material to identify you from among 6.whatever billions of people on this earth? That green, bubbling looghie has all of your DNA information. Someday SCIENCE will be able to clone you from your snot!
Today, President George W Bush issued his FIRST presidential VETO in six years to block Senate Legislation that would have allowed Scientists receiving Federal money to expand their studies into Embryonic Stem Cell Research utilizing the hundreds of thousands of "waste embryos" from our Nation's Stockpile of frozen "Maybe Babys. - little assembledges of goo smaller than what you blow out your nose. Now did our FEARLESS LEADER just discover the pen marked "FOR VETO ONLY" at the back of his oval office desk drawer, was he practicing spelling it (sounds like 'neato!') Why his first Presidential VETO, against the wishes of his governing party (Hell, Nancy Reagan endorses it?)
Now I admit, I have a hard time with Sally and Sam Saved, the classic "born-again" fertilizer chasers spending hundreds of thousands of largely donated dollars so that they can conceive "litters" of six or more of their own "biological" offspring and audaciously saying that the herd they spew forth is somehow GOD'S WILL (P.S. anytime someone says or writes those two words to lend power to their will or point of view, you can bank on the fact that they are LIARS and wouldn't know GOD'S WILL if she suddenly reached down and smote them) and that producing these swarms of FRANKEN-Babies is preferable to adopting any of the hundreds of thousands of children who wait worldwide for parents. So somehow this ridiculously expensive procedure has been shoe-horned into the idiot panoply of "Blessed Science."
But be that as it may, artificial insimination is not something done with laser-like precision. A couple comes in asking for a baby and nine months later has a baby. Nope. In fact the various fertility strategies succeed by over-fertilizing donor tissue in the lab and trowelling as much of the viable material into the uterus as possible. With any luck eight or ten of GOD'S little blessings will take hold, a known percentage will fail (who cries for them?). If over a dozen take, many may be "harvested" from the Mother's uterus for the health of their siblings (again, no tears, no little coffins.) Except for those really weird couples who decide to bring some number of offspring more akin to rat reproduction rather than human to term.
"I belive it's GOD'S WILL that I bring all sixteen babies to term. I've named them after all of the books of the New Testament that I could remember except the ones that sound like ghetto-names you'd see on a tag at a convenience store. My doctors tell me I will have to sleep at an angle with a specialy formed foam cork held firmly between my knees until at last they can be delivered. We are accepting your generous contributions at CHRIST'S HOPE FOR A CROWDED HEAVEN BAPTIST CHURCH in Euless, TX."
Whatever the individual outcome, however, EXTRAS are made and EXTRAS must be dealt with. They don't get donated to other couples or stay frozen forever with Walt Disney waiting for some childess world when we'll need that biological stock. We don't have herds of maidens on deserted islands birthin' GOD'S WILL'S EXTRAS. They are routinely destroyed. Not buried, no headstone or service...thawed, scrambled and tossed. Not all that atypical for eggs, I guess.
But let an unusually thoughtful Congress listen to the 70% of the American Voters who want these spare embryos used in the research of real human diseases that kill people named Bob or Gloria or Ronnie or Michael J. Fox suggest an expansion of research into the as yet untapped potential of Human Embrionic Stem Cell Research and a MIRACLE happens! W finds his VETO pen and within days has practiced writing it AND the extra embryos are destroyed anyway. W isn't rescuing them from being used in research or prolonging their little frozen tour on this planet. They are simply destroyed without potential. It is a given that they lack the potential for their own lives - they didn't make the cut. They are not babies. They have NO FUTURE. Not even the Roman Catholic Church has written in some low-income housing in LIMBO for the "unwashed and not quite conceived" to float around in until someone prays them out to Heaven where I guess the little balls of goo would have special seating to avoid accidentaly being wiped up.
For the Blessed Science of Artificial Insemination they are waste, accepted. For the Potential Science of Embryonic Stem Cell Research they suddenly become little balls of boy and girl goo...cute little spitballs all.
Blasphemous...Nyah. Stupid...Not compared to the Right to Life "Regardless How Remote from Actual Living"
Doubts never occur to those afraid to challenge their own Beliefs. Wisdom from a distance may be madness close up.